wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
