shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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