: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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