he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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