She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
