Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good? http://tfl.nu/tswm
  Replies (13) Good night (2695) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized

  (914): View more from New York

  No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized (914): No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes." http://tfl.nu/s64m
  Replies (23) Good night (3181) Bad night (738)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl. http://tfl.nu/cd5h
  Replies (20) Good night (5477) Bad night (714)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple http://tfl.nu/8ojo
  Replies (60) Good night (773) Bad night (6145)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover. http://tfl.nu/1njk
  Replies (14) Good night (3048) Bad night (1117)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket http://tfl.nu/744s
  Replies (2) Good night (3273) Bad night (1335)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall. http://tfl.nu/yba5
  Replies (3) Good night (1393) Bad night (407)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win. http://tfl.nu/1toi
  Replies (7) Good night (1517) Bad night (496)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor. http://tfl.nu/d172
  Replies (9) Good night (929) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (507): I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner. http://tfl.nu/ny52
  Replies (14) Good night (1170) Bad night (755)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk. http://tfl.nu/cpk7
  Replies (9) Good night (730) Bad night (396)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking http://tfl.nu/y8vi
  Replies (1) Good night (575) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Don't make emojis simulating eating me out

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): Don't make emojis simulating eating me out http://tfl.nu/tdiy
  Replies (5) Good night (643) Bad night (296)
• Favorite

  (682): View more from Texas

  I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (682): I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life. http://tfl.nu/x9h1
  Replies (10) Good night (848) Bad night (321)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie. http://tfl.nu/o30z
  Replies (2) Good night (505) Bad night (230)

Randomize