I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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