I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
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