I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
oh god the rape fog is back!
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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