At least make sure they are 18
Why
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
