***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I think your dad took our porno
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.