i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
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Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
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NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
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