we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
