yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize