Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
