Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
