She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize