Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize