I just threw up on my dentist
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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