I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Randomize
