Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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