Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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