I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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