it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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