I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
