Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
