I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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