1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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