Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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