If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
