kristin has been a bad kristin
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
