We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
