I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
