I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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