Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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