she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
