Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Every concussion has its silver lining
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
