I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i came on her dog
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
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If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
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This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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