What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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