sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
