How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Randomize
