What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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