i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
