i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Is it because I queefed?
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
