real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
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