i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this