It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
