are you still at the devil's house?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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