i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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