A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
