Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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